divorce & recovery coaching

Separation is an enormous transition. It demands that we plan for the future in the midst of turmoil, that we create an immediate stability amidst chaos and unknowables, and most importantly, it asks us to re-align ourselves with who we want to be, while we are simultaneously taking on a plethora of logistical issues, grieving, and learning new skills. You may be in the very beginning stages or at the end of a drawn out divorce. You may be several years past it and still not settled in your heart and mind. You may be going through another type of transition. We have many in this life! While coaches can not act as attorneys or psychologists, in that we neither advise nor diagnose, we can help to establish what is really at stake. We can help you to be more effective with an attorney, should that be necessary. We can help you to be more effective in communication so that reactive responses are less likely, regardless of your partner’s behavior. We do not ask why something happened, or who was to blame for something happening, but we can help to identify patterns of thought or actions taken by you or others, and in this way we can help you to cut through the emotional obstacle course. Working from the inside out, and becoming familiar with your own motivations and desires will allow you to make choices that align with your values. When we align with our values, we can be at ease with our actions. 

The focus of a coaching session will not be on the “to do’s” or the “shoulds”. Our sessions are not another project for you to take on. Our time together will be grounding and energizing. I am here to listen with respect, to connect, and to reflect. From that process, you will find clarity where there was stuck thinking; you will develop confidence where there is a pattern of uncertainty and self doubt, and you will exercise courage in the very act of showing up for yourself in this way, which will lead to more courageous acts, creating a virtuous cycle. Your job is to be open and patient; willing and curious.  When our nervous system is at ease, we can shift perspective. When we trust the environment and the process, we can make healthy decisions and take forward action. Coaching is at its greatest service when it helps you to uncover or to reconnect with your self awareness and self agency.